Facing My Giants

I love the song "The Voice of Truth" by Casting Crowns. It just speaks to me, and every time I hear it, my breath catches and I feel like it was written just for me. Recently, when I participated in a 5k I played this song several times to give myself inspiration and the extra push to keep going.

My favorite verse, and one I didn't even really notice until recently is...

Oh, what I would do
to have the kind of strength it takes
To stand before a giant
with just a sling and a stone
Surrounded by the sound
of a thousand warriors
shaking in their armor
Wishing they'd have had the strength to stand

My laundry pile is never ending...literally. I've gotten to where I complete  5-6 loads of laundry a day and I still can't keep up.

Laundry may seem trivial, but it is one of my giants. Until today, I don't even remember the last time I separated my laundry. I just kind of threw it all in out of desperation. But mostly it was this big, looming, "giant" that I hated and feared at the same time.

It shouldn't be this hard. 

So this year is all about simplifying my life and facing my giants...the first of which is my laundry pile.

By Sunday evening I plan to have a sidewalk covered in garbage bags ready to be donated or thrown away...with the exception of a few of their clothes that were given as gifts that will be rotated and put away periodically.

Each person gets 8 outfits. Six everyday (three pairs of jeans, six t shirts), one business casual (polo/sweater, khakis, etc) and one super dressy ( fancy dress, slacks/shirt/tie)
6 pairs of everyday socks and two pairs of dress socks...
6 pairs of underwear, 2 undershirts and 6 pairs of socks.
One set of sheets for each bed, with one extra in each bed size, in case of emergency.
10 pillowcases10 bath towels,
two hand towels,
10 wash clothes,
4 kitchen towels

I will probably always have to do at least one load of towels a day, but only having to spend the entire day in the laundry room once or twice a week will be such a relief. Just having a plan of attack is a huge relief.

Please pray for me as I face this giant down! I can use all the Divine intervention I can get!


What giants are you facing? Let me know and I'll be your prayer warrior this week!

How I'm Doing It

I get a lot of questions from people about how I'm losing my weight and how I finally got the motivation I needed to start losing the 176lbs I had gradually gained over a 12 year period.

I honestly cringe when anyone asks me for workout/diet advice. Because, let's be honest, I'm not qualified to give it. I still have 74 lbs to lose and a lot of years to keep it off.

It really hit me today though. A year ago, I had given up. I had given up on myself. I wore my fat as armor...with a crest that said "I'm a horrible person who's done horrible things and let everyone, including myself, down and this is what I deserve"...it's a disclaimer so that nobody will mistake me for a valid human being.

I was hopeless. Literally. The best I could hope for was to raise my children to be different. And even that seemed far-fetched.

The only thing I can say, and at the risk of being branded a kook, is that God made the difference for me. I realized that the only way anything was going to change for me is through Him. I was desperate, I was at the end of my rope and I had to completely rely on God for anything positive in my life. So, in a nutshell, it was/is Divine intervention.

I'm not going to claim to know how God works...but I know He does...He is. And I am living proof of that.

My Own Deuteronomy.

I don't know about you, but for years I struggled in my reading of Dueteronomy. I did fine with the rest of Pentateuch but for some reason Dueteronomy killed me every time. It's just so repetitive. I mean, that's kind of the point of Dueteronomy. God told Joshua to repeat the law to the children of Israel one more time before they entered the Promised Land.

Over and over, God takes precautions to help the Israelites remember who they were, and where they'd come from, who they served.

Because God knows us. He knows that in our day to day lives, we'll forget. We'll forget that the reason we're here, the reason for all of this is, Him. Everything I have is because He gave it to me. I take credit for things that are not mine to take credit for.

The last few weeks in my weight loss journey (seriously, it's kind of annoying to hear that phrase...and yet...I just used it! Gag me!) have been a struggle for me. Right now I'm within 1.4 lbs of reaching one hundred pounds of weight loss. In the sum of a month, I've lost between 2 and 3 pounds. I'm used to losing that, or more, in a week.

I think it all amounts to a need to refocus. A need to remember. Remember that the point of all this isn't just weight loss. The point of all this is preparing my body to glorify God. Because obesity is a spiritual muscle relaxer. You don't have the confidence to step out into the water and other people don't have the confidence in you to ask you to. You wouldn't ask someone who'd just taken muscle relaxers to dig a ditch...people who take muscle relaxers sleep afterward.

So this week I'm taking the time to refocus. To remember where I've come from, who I am and who I serve.

Because all of this, all of the lessons I'm learning, mean nothing if not in the light of Jesus.