Frost Vs. Nixon

I have always enjoyed history. I became a bit disillusioned though when I realized that the history I had been taught as truth, was just one person's perspective, and that there were as many versions of what happened as there are people to tell them. And every person believes their version is the truth and all the others are bunk. I became a little bit cynical.

I have grown to love it again though. I love studying people. What motivates them, what drives them, the general context of their decisions. I've learned to view the events and people less judgmentally, realizing that sometimes I've heard stories about a person that may have shaped my view of events or people. I may be making assumptions that are not true. So, I love hearing the same story from as many different perspectives as possible. And usually, I gain compassion and can see the point of view of almost everyone involved. I may not agree with the decisions they made, but I have compassion for them. Bad behavior is not excused, but I can lay down my judgment and negative feelings for the PERSON while still disagreeing with their actions. 

And that's why I love history. It teaches me compassion. It teaches me to reserve judgment most of the time. But if I need to form an opinion, to see through attempts to bias or manipulate me and to get to the heart of the matter and form an independent decision. 

I get on kicks of the parts of history that I'm interested in. Lately, I've been reading and watching documentaries about Richard Nixon.

Celebrate Recovery has done a lot to help me be compassionate as well. To react to others the way I would want to be reacted to. To listen without reacting or judging. To trust God to work in other people's lives without me beating them over the head. Not excusing or condoning or accepting sin...but being compassionate to the person. Because I know where I've been. I know I still struggle. So viewing them through the lens that I wish to be viewed through helps me to love them anyway.

This week, after watching speeches that Richard Nixon gave, watching  documentaries and reading everything I could find, I watched David Frost interview Nixon. The real one...not the dramatized version from a view years ago.

I found it profoundly interesting.

One of the things that struck me was how often David Frost allowed Nixon to keep talking when he wasn't answering the question or the answer seemed utterly ridiculous or convoluted. David Frost just sat there and listened, blank faced most of the time. Frost would present him with transcripts of conversations from the Oval Office that seemed damning, but Nixon found some way to explain it. 

I'm not sure I could have sat there and listened without reacting or interrupting. But David Frost did.

At one point, Nixon went on and on and on and on. I am positive I could not have been as patient as David Frost was ! But there he sat, blank faced and silent. Letting President Nixon process through it.

And because he did that, President Nixon came the closest I've ever known him to come to admitting that he did anything wrong during the Watergate scandal. “I let the American people down" came out of his mouth.

I've been thinking about this moment ever since. What if David Frost had interrupted him or talked over him? We may have never gotten that.

There is value in remaining silent. In not reacting. Not a head nod, not an eye roll, not a nose scrunch or brow furrow. Not concocting a reply. Just. Listening.

It's something we learn at CR. And something I'm still working on. But it made me think...how often could progress be made infinitely more quickly if we just let people process through things? Even if we think what they are saying is stupid? If we just quiet our thoughts, stop trying to fix, stop judging and defending, and just...listen. Sometimes people just need to wade through the mud of denial to get to the breakthrough. 

I don't have to police every word, call out every ridiculous thought. It's okay to just remain silent and love people anyway. To let them go on and on and on and on. Or give a convoluted answer. It's not my job to fix people. There is someone whose job that is. His name is God. And you and I are not him. 

Anyway, that's one place I saw God this week.

Thanks for letting me share.